Bruised Heart

Secret

Chapter 14

Secret

Greeley Estates

“Good morning.” I sighed as I opened my eyes to see Johnny B was already awake next to me.

“Its no longer the morning. Good afternoon.” Johnny B replied quietly. It was silent for a moment before he leaned up on his elbow so he was facing me and said, “About yesterday…what was that about? It wasn’t the movie was it?”

“I wish it was the movie.” I mumbled under my breath. “It doesn’t matter. It was only a dream.” I smiled the best I could as I got out of his bed, goose bumps instantly spreading over my exposed arms and stretched them over my head.

“Come here.” Johnny B said, patting the side of the bed that I just vacated.

I slowly walked back over to the bed and got back under the covers, fighting back the chilly air. “I’m listening.”

My heart rate started to pick up when he got closer to me. “I’m just going to lay this out on the table.” Johnny B started. “I like you. I haven’t actually liked someone for years. I never planned on it again. I don’t know, you’re just different. I want you to know that I am here to listen. I know a little bit about your…ex -and I use that term loosely-, but if you need someone to spill to, I will be here. For anything.”

I had no words to say to that. I want to accept what he said and believe him, but what if I start to let him in and my dream becomes a reality. I couldn’t live with myself if I got him killed. Well from the way my dream was turning out, it wouldn’t be long before I died by Alex’s hand also. “If only you knew…” I whispered as I turned my head so I was facing the opposite wall.

“If only I knew what?” Johnny B asked, turning my head so I had to look at him. “Trust me.”

“If you knew what happened when I was with Alex…I don’t think you would like me. I didn’t like me.” I still don’t like myself like I used to.

“That isn’t your fault. Its that fuckers fault. You need to forget about that looser and just be yourself.”

“Much easier said than done.” I said as I sat up, so my back was against the wall. I pulled the covers off me and stood up. I closed my eyes before I whispered, “If I show you this, you cannot tell anyone. Hayley doesn’t even know.” I waited for confirmation before I lifted my shirt, turning around so he could see the scar that went from my hip and went around to the middle of my back. “That was from a knife. This was the second time he ever hurt me. Physically.” I took a deep breath and said, “It was after he realized Hayley and I weren’t going to stop being friends. I didn’t want to drop her like I did all my other friends, she meant too much to me, it also helped that she was too stubborn to let a guy get between us…Alex didn’t like that too much.”

It was silent for at least thirty seconds before Johnny B even said anything. “Holy fuck.” Were the first words out of his mouth, suddenly standing directly behind me. “Does your mom know about this?” He asked as he trailed his finger along the jagged scar.

“She thinks it was just an accident. I never told her who did it or what really happened…you’re the only one who knows the truth about it.” I replied as I took a step away and pulled my shirt back down, turning around to face him.

“What was your dream?” He whispered, pulling me into his arms.

“It seemed so real. I even told myself in my dream that I was dreaming. It couldn’t actually be happening, but he made me think it was real after he slapped me across the face. I felt my cheek sting from the force of his slap. You were shaking me when he started kicking me.” I shook my head no, back and forth and said, “That wasn’t even the worst part.” I forced back the tears that were making their way known as the image of him on the floor, covered in blood and continued, “The first thing I remember, I was looking for you, expecting you to jump out and scare me after watching that movie. I opened your bedroom door and there was Alex, standing over your motionless, bloody body. He killed you. I cant let someone I care about get hurt by him.” Care about? Where did that come from? Why the hell did I just say that?!

“I’m glad you care, but you don’t have to worry about me. He doesn’t even know where I live. Besides, he’s in a wheel chair. There is no way he could even here without a ride. I don’t think he would want to wheel his way over here. It would take a long time for him to push himself here.” A chuckle escaped his lips, a mental image, most likely popping into his head.

“That’s another thing he was saying though. In my dream he was saying, he was following me. I lead him here. I was the reason you died.”

“I’m right here. He isn’t going to hurt me. You have nothing to worry about.”

“I’m not going to stop worrying about you.” My mouth dropped open as I realized what just spilled out of my mouth. “I have no idea why I just said tha-” My sentence got cut off as Johnny B pressed his lips against mine. Holy shit! He’s actually kissing me. Its not just my imagination or a dream. I’m fully awake and kissing Johnny B.

It could have been minutes, hours, or seconds later when I pulled back, gasping for air. “That was uh…” I trailed off not knowing what to say. If I did say anything, I’m sure I would have embarrassed myself.

“Yeah. Umm. I don’t know what came over me. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m not.” I said, not breaking eye contact. There was a brief silence, before I cleared my throat and asked, “You hungry?”

“Are you cooking?” He asked with a smirk on his face.

“Sure.” I turned my back on him and made my way to the kitchen. “Is Lloyd still here?”

“Umm. I don’t know. He might be.” Johnny B replied behind me.

I didn’t bother replying as I started looking through cupboards for something to cook. I’ll just make enough just in case. I stopped what I was doing when I heard Johnny B chuckling behind me. I slowly turned around and gave him a questioning look. “What’s so funny?”

“I just thought of something. Are you sure you want to hear it?”

“Humor me.” I said as I started taking out pots and pans, waiting for Johnny B to tell me what was on his mind.

“I wish I had an orgasm-orator.” A chuckle escaped his lips as he continued, “I could walk around town and shoot people with it, giving them orgasms. Cashiers, bishops, nuns.” He bust out laughing before he said, “I’d never stop!”

I couldn’t help myself as I started laughing myself. I have to admit, that would be hilarious! “I would really like to know what is on your mind twenty four seven.”

“That’s not even the beginning of it.” Johnny B said as he leaned against the counter as I started mixing the eggs to make French toast.

“What’s going on in here?” Lloyd asked as he made his way into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes.

“Andie is kind enough to make breakfast.” Johnny B said, looking over at Lloyd. I didn’t miss the look that passed between them.

“Thanks…how are you holding up?” Lloyd asked, mimicking Johnny B, by leaning his back against the counter on the opposite side of me.

“I’m doing fine.” I lied. “It was just a dream.” I mumbled as I flipped the cooking bread.

“Alright…” Lloyd trailed off as he yawned and took a seat at the table, waiting for his food most likely.

“You can confide in him also…just so you know.” Johnny B whispered so Lloyd didn’t have a chance of hearing.

“I’m just not…I’ll think about it.” I said hesitantly. I’d like to talk to Hayley about…everything first. “Please don’t say anything.” I said as Johnny B started to walk towards Lloyd.

“Mums the word.” He smiled.

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SO very sorry I didn’t upload when I said I was going to. The day I was going to a whole lot of shit started going down. It seems like my family is going down the shitter. Maybe one of these days, I’ll write a blog about all the crap that’s been going…Do you guys like the chapter though?? Let me know what you guys think. :D