BEAUTIFUL MONSTER

5 : Spank Thy Ass Mom

[No offence to any One Direction fans, but if you do get offended write down your feelings on a piece of paper and then flush it down the toilet].

"You're shitting me." Deacon groaned, putting his head in his hands in despair.

I grinned, holding out the tackily done beaded bracelet. "If I have to do what you say, you have to do what I say."

"Yeah, but..." He gestured to the piece of thread in my hand. "Really? You couldn't have done anything else?"

"Sorry I'm not creative enough to make you a model of the Eiffel Tower," I quipped sarcastically. "Here, hold out your arm."

"It's so colourful," he moaned, as I tied it around his wrists, knotting it one too many times. "And what the heck are these?" He flicked a bead.

"They're friendship beads, it looks nice." I snorted, the bracelet handmade by yours truly looked completely out of place against his muscled and tanned arm. Perfect.

"Where's yours?" He accused, "I'm not going to be wearing this if you aren't."

"Relax, I have mine." I lifted my leg up, and pulled my sock down, showing him the small, almost-bear bracelet.

He narrowed his eyes. "Why does that have a chain around it? It has less beads than mine does. Swap!"

"No way," I quickly jumped away from his grabbing hands, laughing. "I put a chain because it looks nice - and no you couldn't have had one because I didn't have enough chains," I quickly added as he opened his mouth.

"Wear yours on your arm," he demanded but I shook my head, taking off my backpack.

"Here, you haven't finished the food already, have you?"

"It's been two days," he said dryly. "As much food you gave me I'm a grown man and I don't eat the same as you."

I handed him a egg and cress sandwich while I took out a Cadbury bar for myself. "Well, maybe you should look to dieting."

He lifted up the vest he was wearing. "Does any of this look like fat?"

I glanced, forcing myself to look uninterested. "Lets keep this PG,"

"Huh," he snorted, "you were drooling all over me the other day."

"Don't flatter yourself; I've seen better."

"Yeah?" He scoffed, "Dumb and Dumber's?"

"No," I took a bite, getting a mouthful of nuts, raisins and chocolate-goodness. "Internet. Male models. Yum."

He rolled his eyes. "If only you couldn't delete the browsing history."

I took out my music player, untangled my headphones as Deacon snatched the bar from me, taking a large bite before tossing it back. I sighed, choosing not to comment, instead I offered him a earbud.

As I pressed play, I put the other earbud into my ear and leaned back.

"This is shit," Deacon took my music player, going through the songs. "You have bad taste."

"You're lucky it's not a One Direction song,"

"Who?"

I made a face. "You don't know who One Direction are?"

He shook his head and I patted his arm, "Ignorance is bliss, Deacon, ignorance is bliss."

He pressed play on "Bullet" and commented. "Hollywood Undead? Nice."

I shrugged, "I try,"

As we listened to the music and eat, we leaned against a tree trunk, not speaking and it was nice. I actually enjoyed it. Never mind the fact Deacon could potentially be extremely dangerous (actually I know he is) but sitting there, I didn't have it in me to care about the potential threat he could pose to me.