How Boys Speak

 Reece Speaks: Having some fun with Cheaters.

So since a lot of you enjoyed the last topic about married people having affairs, we decided to broaden the topic with “Cheaters”.  Nobody likes a cheater, if I see a cheater I would want to squash a potato on their head and dance around them doing some voodoo magic just so that I could see some bit of fear in their faces. (LOL, I’m not that crazy! You believe me, right?)

So before I started to prank call people, I decided to ask the guys for their opinions on cheating on Facebook inbox. Here’s what they said:

This was the question I asked all of them:

Hey, just doing something quick for Wattpad. What’s your view on cheating? Keep it simple!

***

Clyde: What? Like relationships? Who cares? You’re not tied down! Hey, does my hair look too styled or just right in my pic?
Reece: Looks good man.
Clyde: Cool. Hey, Reece?
Reece: Yeah?
Clyde: You’re an asshole.

***

Dean: I won’t cheat. I mean I won’t cheat like Tiger Woods. I think that people can make mistakes. I won’t cheat, though. I’m sure I won’t cheat. I’m really sure. I shalt not cheat.
Reece: Ok, I get it. There’s no such word as shalt, Dean.
Dean: Fuck you, Shakespeare.

***

Brandon: I don’t know, never thought about it. I think my baby toe is broken ever since I wedged my foot on the beach rocks.
Reece: You have more to say about your baby toe than cheating in relationships?
Brandon: Yeah because the baby toe is like sticking out from the rest. Nobody wants a retarded fucking toe.

***

Roger: Fuck you.
Reece: None of you gave proper answers!
Roger: I wouldn’t know about the desire to cheat since I haven’t had a girlfriend!
Reece: Hey but if you Skype to girls at the same time that might be cheating?
Roger: Fuck you.

Anyway, despite their poor attitude I still have people to prank! So hope you enjoy!

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Prank 1:

Advert:

I’m stuck in a relationship loop for 3 years, getting bored. I want a hot and sexy guy willing to satisfy me. I’m 23 and have brown hair and brown eyes. I’m 5’3 and 130lbs. I want a tall, hot guy to fulfill my wildest dreams. Kara

*Ring Ring*

Kara: Hello?

Reece: Sup, this Carla?

Kara: *laughs* It’s pronounced Kara

Reece: That’s what I said bro. Carla. How you doin’?

Kara: It’s Kara.

Reece: Oh cool, I’m Ben.

Kara: So where did you get my number from?

Reece: From uhm that site, I forgot its name.

Kara: Where?

Reece: BONGA!

Kara: What?

Reece: Huh?

Kara: Where did you get my number from?

Reece: From ******. Chillax dawg.

Kara: I’m not your dog. You’re fucking weird.

Reece: So Karry, you want to have some phone sex or not?

Kara: It’s Kara. I don’t do it with weird guys like you but since you’re hot... (I emailed her a picture of a guy I found on Google, you know... my usual antics.)

Reece: Yeah! Start, Karl!

Kara:  I open your belt slowly and my fingers linger over your-

Reece: I’m not wearing a belt. I’m broke. I use my nephew’s skipping rope as a belt, like a boss.

Kara: *Laughs* I untie your rope-

Reece: Yeah ‘cos my nephew, that bitch been through a lot. And that motherf*cker, he just skip the whole day. (LOLWAT?)

Kara: Okay... I untie your rope and open brush my fingers on your underwear.

Reece: I mean that homey, I’d be calling him for some lunch... and all he do is skip. You know what I’m saying?

Kara: Okay, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Reece: I am trying to communication with chu!

Kara: You’re talking about your retarded nephew while we’re having phone sex.

Reece: What? What chu tryna say? You wait, imma call my bro for you!

I give the phone to Brandon

Brandon: Hello?

Kara: Uhm, who is this?

Brandon: I’m Ben’s brother... Sten.

Kara: Your name is Sten?

Brandon: Yes.

Kara: And his name is Ben?

Brandon: Yes.

*awkward silence*

Brandon: ANYWAY, my brother is insane. But you sound sexy...