A Slave to Love

Chapter 53: Not About Trust

Blade POV

I was losing my mind. My room, my only place to do what I wanted and forget about everything, was ruined. I couldn't forget about her since her scent was just about everywhere; in the air, on my clothes, my bed...

I couldn't even look at it without guilt hitting me like a punch to the gut.

The look on her face when she woke up and realized what I'd done was a moment I kept reliving, a nightmare that plagued me every waking minute.

Yet there was nowhere else to hide, nowhere else for me to go. I couldn't wander my house at will and go somewhere else to find peace--I didn't deserve it--and it would only put us in each other's path and she had no interest being anywhere near me right now. I didn't even want to be near me.

There was no rest, no respite. The only time I got a bit of sleep was when I went hunting in the woods; I'd find a tree that was high up enough that no one could find or bother me. A few hours here and there were the extent of my sleep.

My phone rang and I groaned from where I was huddled on the floor. Please don't be Mona. Already she had tried calling me multiple times, despite being in the same house, to see what the fuck was my problem. Her words not mine. That was after she'd tried coming into my room, something I'd prevented by locking the door and escaping out the balcony before she lost patience and no doubt burst inside to find me gone.

I reached for my phone above my head on my nightstand. Mom. The one person who wouldn't be able to let things go, who would ask about Kiana and how she was doing because Mom was thoughtful and generous and had adored Kiana from the second she met her. How could she not?

"Yes?" I said when I answered.

"Blade, honey? Something wrong?" Her voice flowed through the cell phone like a waterfall of concern.

"I'm tired, Mom. What did you want?" I asked, trying to at least urge a bit of life into my voice before I worried her so badly she came here to check on me herself and found the remnants of the life I'd blown up.

She huffed, but didn't push. "I was wondering if you and Kiana wanted to come over for dinner. I miss the girl and so does Lexi."

"She's busy. Studying hard for all her exams and doing projects," I said curtly, Kiana's present on my nightstand catching my eye. "Sorry."

"Well that explains your foul mood," Mom said, concern waning. "Is she putting homework ahead of you?"

"Something like that."

"Don't worry. Once exams are over you'll get her back. And once exams are over you guys are coming for dinner so don't forget, we could all use some quality time together."

"Okay, Mom. Sounds good."

Impossible, but good. And nothing more than wishful thinking.

********

Kiana POV

"Okay, Landon seriously. My birthday was Friday and I said I didn't want anything," I groaned, pushing the box back at him.

It had only been two days since I told Landon about the whole Blade situation and Blade had driven me to and from school each day as Aidan hadn't been up to it. The flu had really knocked him out, and I found myself wishing he'd pass his sickness to me so I had an excuse to hide in my room, but apparently germs didn't work like that.

Aidan said he'd be feeling better soon and could probably pick me up today, but I wasn't holding my breath. He had still looked pretty wrecked and his voice was raspier than ever, but I spent what time I could with him after school keeping him company and bringing him soup, and the rest I spent hiding in my own room.

This new routine meant I was hardly wandering the house and therefore hardly saw Mona, so I had little idea of what she was up to but she seemed to be in a worse mood than usual. I usually crossed her on her way out at night, dressed to the nines and heading out alone. What she did or where she went was a mystery, all I knew was that Blade never went with her. He was always home.

School meant I was free from all of that least, with no fear of running into Blade or Mona, and that helped me relax a bit. Classes kept me distracted and so did my friends, as they were definitely trying to be more entertaining and comforting than usual thanks to my mystery mood.