Chapter Thirty-One:What It Feels Like To Get Your Heart Broken

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Chapter Thirty-One:What It Feels Like To Get Your Heart Broken

 I flex my fingers around the handle of the spatula and gingerly open one squeezed shut eye. The thing that's on the pan is not an egg, nor does it remotely resemble one. If an egg could be passed through hell and then book, it wouldn't look as burnt as it does now. When I say burnt I'm just being gentle to my ego. The thing is scorched beyond belief and the sight of it makes my stomach heave.

Dear God.

There are footsteps leading into the kitchen so I know he's there, obviously. The Cole senses are tingling and his freshly showered scent hits me like truckload of bricks. But I must resist and not fall for his boyishly charming ways. Squaring my shoulders, I put up a defensive front and pluck the frying pan from the stove top, dumping its contents into the trash can.

Something cooked is out of the order now so fruit bowl it shall be. Or I could forget about fitting into my prom dress and slather my favourite chocolate spread onto a butter croissant. Now that I think about it that would be a great idea since my date to prom will probably be dead before the day arrives. And my brother will be in jail. Reacquainting me with Fatty Tessie doesn't seem that big of a problem.

Heart attack and clogged arteries on a plate it is.

"I can cook something for you if you want me to,"

"No thanks," I mutter and shove past him to go to the fridge.

Even though his voice sends all kinds of tingles through my body, I'm still mad at him. Honestly, I feel humiliated beyond belief that he and my brother would discuss my personal life without actually including me in it. Having spent a long time cast in Nicole's shadow and not really having much control over my actions has made me a little paranoid about things like that. My life is supposed to be mine and it's not an open forum for discussion. Sure, ever since Cole's been back in my life he's had a huge say and role in everything but this particular incident has me reeling to the past and feeling all sorts of out of control.

Say I actually wanted to sleep with him, then what? Would he have said no because he'd made a deal with my brother? My brother who is in a relationship with my best friend, a relationship I've never questioned or stood against. I give them their space, don't interfere and generally stay out of their way.

Could I not expect the same? Yeah, okay sure Cole's being a gentleman and Travis is being a protective older brother but you have to draw the line somewhere right?

"Tessie come on, I said I'm sorry. I shouldn't have discussed our relationship with Travis, especially not that part of it but I really wanted you to come here. He wouldn't have been cool with it otherwise?"

I grab the jar of chocolaty goodness and nearly slam it onto the kitchen island.

"I'm eighteen years old for Christ's sakes! He's my brother not my keeper Cole. Why was it so important for you to make sure he's 'cool' with it?" I ask, starting to feel angry.

"Because," he sighs, "Because he's not my biggest fan and he's your brother. I know how much you love him and how important he is to you. I just, I need him to trust me with you."

"I don't get it. He's always pushed me towards you. Yeah, he was a bit skeptical at first but he's never outright told me to not be with you. But there's something there, something between the two of you that you haven't told me. It's why you feel the need to be accountable to him isn't it?"

His eyes widen, like he wasn't expecting me to make the connection and I know I've hit the nail right on its head. This runs deeper, I know it does.

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