It’s been two days and on those two days we hadn’t been asked to do anything or kill anyone, which we were all grateful for.
We were walking around the forest now, just getting to know the parts of it that we didn’t already. We had separated, to try and cover more land. Trevor, Zack and Tanya went to the west and I was left to walk with Zane.
I deeply enjoyed being with Zane. He was talkative when he saw I was happy and yet he didn’t bother me when he saw the dark thoughts running through my mind. He respected my moods and even if we didn’t talk most of the time, there were very comfortable silences between us. I felt good just by knowing he was beside me. He was like the brother I never had.
“So… how are you feeling?” he asked me suddenly, his voice cutting through the silence. I knew what he was talking about, but that didn’t make it any easier to talk about it. I had been avoiding thinking about him, trying to keep myself busy and working, doing some other things.
“I’m fine” I told him. I didn’t know wether that was a lie or the truth. I felt… fine but at the same time there was something missing. I guess I was moving on but being well aware of what I had lost.
No, I didn’t lose it. It was taken away from me. He was brutally murdered.
I felt my fists tighten at the thought. I instantly relaxed them and let out a deep breath. I had been practicing my control. Tanya talked to me about not letting the anger or the sadness get the best of me because it would be the one thing that brought me down.
I had listened to her and had practiced with his death. Every single time I thought about it I would get incredibly mad and a need to kill someone, Lucy mostly, would fill me but I had been practicing how to tone it down, almost to the point where I wasn’t mad anymore.
“You’re not fine, Kat, and you need to start talking about it. It will start eating you up if you don’t” he said as we walked around a small lake. I nodded and sighed. I knew he was right.
“I miss him, I do” I said, calmer than I thought I would be “I guess I know I have to move on but I feel like there’s something missing. I feel like there’s a part of me that I’ll never get back. I feel silly for feeling that way because I barely knew the guy and I feel angry because I hate the people who brought us all here. I hate the people who actually pay to watch this”
He sighed and nodded.
“I know, Kat, I know” he said. He stopped suddenly and I had to stop myself before I crashed into him.
Everything after that was a complete blur.
I remember hearing a blood-curling scream. It was a girl and the voice sounded scarily familiar. I looked around and realized the sky was getting darker. I suddenly felt scared.
I stared at Zane’s back worriedly.
“Zane?” I asked again, gulping loudly. I was officially scared now.