My Professor is an Eyesore

Lesson 33

Lesson 33

Right Minus Wrong

I instantly texted RR right after Ate walked out. Right now, I can't breathe. I lost my sister... because of this marriage. Did I really do the right thing?

I heard fast footsteps on the wooden stairs. RR came into the view right away.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he cupped my face. "Where's Cine?" Tumingin siya sa paligid.

I bowed my head and bit my lip. Don't cry Cheska!

"Nauna na siyang umalis..."

"She called me and asked-"

"I told her to ask you herself."

"Cheska," he must have sensed something went wrong. Truth be told, everything went wrong. "Tingnan mo 'ko. Anong mga sinabi niya sa'yo?"

"'Wag ko na raw siyang kilalanin bilang kapatid." Agad kong tinikom ang bibig ko dahil alam kong papahikbi na ako. Kailan pa ako naging crybaby?!

Umupo siya sa harap ko at hinawakan ang kamay ko. His brows were furrowed. Maybe he did not expect that my conversation with my sister will turn out like this.

"What does she want?"

"She wants you back... Gusto niyang maghiwalay tayo. I told her that I want to keep our marriage but RR she was freaking out. Kung ano-ano ang sinabi niya."

"She was like that when I wanted to break up with her bago tayo ikasal." He brushed his thumb on my hand. "Kakausapin ko siya, don't worry."

I just nodded as I fought my tears back.

"Let's go home..."

* * *

"RR, magpapahangin muna ako sa swimming area. Mauna ka na sa unit," sabi ko sa kanya pagkapasok namin sa elevator ng condo.

"Sure, basta 'wag kang magtatagal. Malamig sa labas."

RR patted my head before I stepped out of the elevator once it reached the floor where the swimming area was located.

"Good evening, Ma'am," bati sa akin ng guard. Ngumiti ako nang bahagya pabalik sa kanya.

The cold breeze of the night immediately hit me as I walked near the pool. I sat on one of the deck chairs and settled to lie on it. Pinikit ko ang mga mata ko.

I was sure I sighed loudly.

Bakit naging ganito kakumplikado? Looking back, my life was pretty normal before my first day in school. Ang problema ko lang noon ay kung ano ang bibilhin ko kapag bored ako.

"Lalim ng iniisip mo ah? Care to share, Miss Cheska?" I opened my eyes as soon as I heard the voice. Sir Neil's face was above mine.

Napaayos kaagad ako ng upo.

"Alam ko na," bungad ko sa kanya.

Alam kong alam niya na agad kung ano ang tinutukoy ko base sa ekspresyon ng mukha niya.

"How?"

I patted the space beside me to signal that I want him to take a seat. Baka maging mahabang usapan ito. He got my gesture and sat beside me. Our thighs were touching.

I told him everything starting from the basketball game incident until my conversation with Ate at the coffee shop.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Cheska... I did not expect na ganoon ang magiging reaction ni Francine." Iniling niya ang ulo niya habang nakayuko. "Sorry din kasi hindi ko sinabi sa'yo yung alam ko. It's just I know that I don't have the right to say those matters to you."

"Hindi kami close ni Ate pero ang sakit lang na kaya niyang gawin 'yun pala sa akin. She was close to being a mistress of her own sister's husband."

"Nakakatanga talaga ang pag-ibig." He sighed. "I had my fair share of stupidity when it comes to love. I allowed myself to be an instrument to break my cousin's heart before. Nasabi naman na iyon sa'yo ni pinsan 'di ba?" he smiled bitterly.

"I loved Francine so much. I loved her silently. Masaya na ako noon na makita siyang masaya kasama si Rodrick. Honestly, noong wala na si pinsan dito sa bansa, umasa ako na may chance na ako sa Ate mo." Tumawa siya nang bahagya. At napawi rin ang ang ngiti sa mga labi niya.

"Pero wala pa rin pala. It has always been Rodrick..."

Hinawakan ko ang kanang kamay niya. "I'm so sorry to hear that, Sir."

"I'm okay now! Don't worry. At kapag tayo lang, just call me by my name. Neil will be fine." Humigpit nang kaunti ang hawak din niya sa kamay ko.

I am just comforting him, right? Wala namang malisya 'to.

I smiled at him. "Neil then."

"Cheska, may sasabihin pala ako sa'yo. Ayaw ko sanang makadagdag sa mga iniisip mo. But I think this is the best time to say this." His tone was very serious.

I could feel my heart pounding inside my chest. Damn. What is he going to say?

"Ayaw ko nang maulit yung dati. You know, your sister, my cousin and I issue. It was a mess, Cheska. I did all I could to stop myself from... from..." he stammered as I realized he was hesitating to say the next words.

"From what, Neil?" I inquired. Kinakabahan din ako sa sasabihin niya. Maybe it's the instinct that tells me it's gonna be good but it's gonna be bad as well...

"I was able to keep it until... what happened outside the bar. You remembered that night, Cheska? Noong galing tayo sa Korean restaurant. You drank because you were upset about my cousin." He avoided my gaze as he withdrew his hand from our clasp.

"A-anong nangyari noon? I was drunk, right? And sabi ni RR, hinatid mo raw ako sa unit."

"Yeah, I know you were drunk, Cheska. And I was guilty of what I did back then..."

Damn, what did he do?! Did he -

"You kissed me..."

What.... WHAT?!

"SERIOUSLY?" bulalas ko sa kanya. Ramdam ko ang init sa mukha ko ngayon. Bakit ang kalat ko?! "I...I am sorry, Neil. I did not know -"

He cut me off. "You don't have to be sorry, Cheska." Then he cursed. "For what it's worth, damn, I liked it. That's what I'm guilty about."

Hindi ako gumalaw sa pwesto ko dahil sa mga naririnig ko. Totoo ba talaga itong naririnig ko? Or baka hallucination lang dahil nakaka-stress ang araw na ito?

"Neil, I think-"

"I kissed you back. And then you passed out. I'm so sorry... Damn. I did not do anything further than that, do not worry. But I hope you will forgive me for kissing you back."

I did not dare to utter any word. Even I tried to, my voice has seemed to betray me.

"I think I fell for you, too. This time, my cousin's wife." He cursed at himself repeatedly. Napasabunot siya sa buhok niya.

I blinked my eyes to make sure I am not dreaming. He touched the tips of my fingers and looked at me with his longing eyes. Damn, the touch felt so real. I am not fcking dreaming.

My phone buzzed. A message from RR.

From: Shithead Asshole

I'm worried na malamig dyan. Pababa na ako to bring you a jacket. :*