Chapter 36

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A/N: Phew. I posted this and me being paranoid I went on my ipod to email myself the chapter so I could save it when i turned the laptop back on and when I went to the chapter on my ipod only half was there. I dont have the best track record with wattpad so I freaked out and turned my laptop back on but its all still here. I saved it to word and a flashdrive now. Thanks for being awesome readers! Enjoy!

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"No." I stated sharply with the phone pressed against my ear.

"But Lynn, you promised that when we both had boyfriends we could go on a trip together" Aria argued, trying desperately to win me over.

"That was for when we were both married, even then I never promised. You know how I feel about planes. Its not just something I can get over" I said, avoiding eye contact with Pheonix as I paced around the room.

You see, after Pheonix mentioned the little soulmate thing, I went into denial and refused to talk to him about it and that's when my phone rang with Aria on the other end trying to convince me to go on a plane so we could have a little get away trip from everything.

"But you can by facing your fear and flying on that plane!" she explained

My stomach turned at the thought of flying on a plane and possibly dying "I don't want to Ari"

"Please" she begged "do it for me Lynn"

"If I wouldn't do it for you two years ago, what makes you think i'll do it for you now?" I asked, leaning against the wall.

Aria sighed on the other end and said "Fine, do it for Pheonix. I'm sure he'd love to spend a little romantic get away with you" she said.

My eyes flashed to Pheonix and in that second we made eye contact. My throat dried up and I couldn't look away from his piercing gaze that said he really wanted to talk. But I just couldn't. Not right now.

"I don't think he does" I mumbled into the phone.

'What'd you do?" She asked automatically

"Why do you always assume its something I did?" I asked, slightly yelling into the phone.

"Because Lynn. you're always insecure about something and end up saying something that screws everything up, or you push people away which has the same affect" she said, making my anger rise.

"Well sorry i'm not ms.perfect" I stated sarcastically

She sighed and said "Look I'm forcing you to come on this trip whether you like it or not. Nothing will go wrong because Pheonix will be there to protect you. Its time to get over your fear" she said, ending the conversation.

"Its my fear and my life, Aria! You cant control what I do!" I yelled and closed the phone then decided to throw my phone across the room, ending in it hitting the wall.

I closed my eyes and leaned against the wall, running my hands through my hair as I slowly slid down the wall until I was in a ball. I couldn't help the tear that rolled down the cheek from all of my misplaced anger and emotions.

Pheonix's arms wrapped around me and pulled me into his chest as he said "Just talk to me about it so you wont destroy your friendship with Aria over something I did"

I continued to cry as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself closer to him.

"It just doesn't make sense. All through high school I could never find anyone who loved me for me and I would always make my 11:11 wish about finding my soulmate and having him love me but it never happened. Then I would hope that something would happen junior year, ya know? To prove everyone wrong cause that's when it always happens in the movies. But when nothing happened, and no one chose to love me back I just gave up with hope. Then you just show up here all perfect and it doesn't make sense! I don't know why but in my head it just doesn't!" I explained, wiping my tears away with the back of my hand.

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