Ephemeral Taste (GxG)- Republished

.10 Living Melancholy

"Are you actually serious?!"

If I only knew, joking is FAR beyond Eryn's true nature. She possess a sensational candor that could send a thousand knees trembling with fear, pairs of fearful orbs into tears and pieces of shattered self-esteem on the rough freezing concrete floor. If I ask the whole St. Claire population who had experienced the tyranny first hand, they will all raise their arms up without any hesitation.

Though, I don't know why the fan crazed-girls still worship the path Barbie is elegantly taking. Oh come on Rhia, maybe a list could satisfy your denial of attraction.

I digress; talking to myself in this dire situation can kill me, aside from circumstances highly reserved for later in case I can't protect myself from her malevolent seduction.

Darn, I hate exaggerations but I'm a natural born pessimist, It's easy to expect that your life long crush didn't know you even exist when in fact she's obsessed with you rather than the other way around.

It is infuriating to see my cousin dead while I happily assumed that he's having a cheesy romantic relationship with his one true love, who unexpectedly, caused him to commit suicide. I haven't even got a clue what my cousin was thinking.. ending his life because of some girl? 

We live in a full circle, sometimes people feel they're limitless, invincible, downright successful but we also get pummeled to the rock bottom, fall into temporary abyss and get battered by a series of strong gigantic waves; he needed someone to tell him that, to pull him out of the dark chasm yet...no one came.

I'm practically there all along, doing my own business and I couldn't believe that I didn't saw it coming. 'It is no one's fault' they all insists, nevertheless, I feel my stomach churning with shameful guilt every time I think about the tragedy. He is like my long lost brother, basically glued to my hip all the time and we predominantly share our deepest darkest secrets but...

I didn't know he's hurting.

I didn't know he's in pain.

I DIDN'T KNOW. and

I AM SUPPOSED TO.

That is the biggest REGRET I ever had, then unconsciously, the second- third- fourth- fifth occurred along with a longer line of mistakes I didn't intend to make, but eventually..I grew tired and stopped counting.

Like a hot pot of thick chocolate instantly pouring at my still chilled exterior..warm soft hands snakes up at my cold flesh, it attacked my skin like a hundred silk butterflies and drags my eyes back completely from the pink sophisticated painted walls into the concerned pool of sapphires.

They're exquisitely clear, glassy, polished into total perfection and linked into the surreal heart-shaped face which I'll still consider stunningly beautiful even if it nurses a long frown.

"Rhia, where did you go?" I never let my guard down, Adrian once said that my expression's hard to read, it does not betray me.

So why does she stares like I've lost someone precious. If I could remember correctly, I should be utterly shocked due to the sudden change of rules planned deliberately by your highness and not upset because I suddenly remember what happened two years ago.

Get a grip Rhia, it isn't the time to ride the emotional coaster..really a bad time.

Eryn's delicate hands start to pull me out of reverie, tugging me between her long toned legs. God, I'm getting nuts and possibly a blabbering lunatic but I am no where an idiot to participate into a challenge where I will unquestionably lose.

I mean look at her, only God knows what horrifying schemes she's currently brewing in her evil pretty mind.

"I've change my mind. I'm not interested in playing your little fraud game anymore." I retorted.