Forgetting Charlotte

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Did you ever love somebody so much that you can't remember your life before them?  

You notice them and the moments your eyes meet, it's as if you realized you lost a piece of your soul, and now found it, right where it should be.  

Your hands force the touch, warmth consuming you, making you feel as if now everything will forever be right.  

You find a will to speak, and before the greetings are complete you know that this person was meant to change your life.  

You know deep down inside that this was somebody you were meant to meet, and though you had no idea that this person existed a moment ago, you know that you will never forget them.

 

I knew the night that I met him that I would never be the same; from the moment I glanced across the room and met his steely grey gaze. The shared glance drew me in and I was drawn to him, as one is without conscious thought. 

I sensed the sensation of excitement as we talked, the words blurring in my mind as I tried to focus on the tone of his voice, noting where the pitch rose and fell in his expression.

 I watched his movements as he tried, successfully, through the night to inch closer and closer to me. His body language, his words, all his outside appearance were as cool and confident as I hoped I was being, but it was his eyes, his intoxicating smoky gaze that told me we shared the same thought.  

Though his hands were as animated as the comical stories he acted out for me, it was the visual contact we shared that remained my focus. He never lowered his sight from mine, seemingly searching my soul and reading my blushing thoughts. It wasn't a glare; it was a look that seemed to be searching for a response to the question we both felt was there. "What was this?"  

His gaze was steadfast, wide with a bit of wonderment, darting back and forth across my face at the end of each topic of conversation as if perhaps my expression would reveal to him what he should do next. He was trying to impress me, and I felt excited all over by it.

By the end of the night we had agreed that we should see each other again, but inside I knew we had to see each other again. We had to know where this was leading us, or if we were even in charge.

We exchanged numbers and simple goodbyes, his hand lingering a little longer on mine as we shook goodbye, sending ripples of excitement up my arm.

I could see by his face there was no disappointment that we wouldn't be going home together, I don't think he even considered it. I knew he, like me, was still trying to figure out where the bolt of lightning came from that hit us both, leaving us both a little scared, both a little curious. I knew as I walked home that night that I was no longer the same person, I just didn't fully understand what that meant.

I still remember that night as if it was yesterday, the wonderment, the curiosity. I still remember how I knew my life was changed forever; I remember it most today, because today is the day he left my life.

 

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