Handcuffed

Chapter 48

Chapter 48

Shockingly, when we got to the station and looked through the tapes, a woman showed up on the screen leaving the locker room.  I know, with my luck, I figured there would be nothing.  However, only the back of her was visible.  The other cameras, including the ones that would have gotten her face or even the ones pointing at the parking lot, mysteriously were unavailable.  Which to me seemed very unlikely.  That's all the sheriff said: that these few tapes were the only ones available and the others - the ones that would have validated my word - were not available. 

Now, it was the moment I never though I would witness, one too great for an unlucky girl like me.  But I saw his face when his innocent eyes reached the cameras and couldn't process what he saw.  His heart was cracking as it was.  Now, I watched it completely shatter when he took in the footage the cameras captured. His lips parted, breath heavy and face as pale as the moon.  He looked sick.  Luke appeared as if he could have died at that moment, right then and there.  He saw the similarities between his wife and the fuzzy picture on the screen.  We couldn't see the face.  But the height, the shape of her body, the way she walked and carried herself.... I could tell it was Clare; it's hard to see but you could tell it was her.  And I think Luke saw what I did: Clare. 

My whole life... I've been waiting and hoping a day would come where I would see such an expression.  One of realization.  One of shock and hurt - absolute hurt and pain.  Looking hard at Luke's face, his expressions, I saw that that day may just be here.  I wanted to cry of joy when I saw his eyes widen, his jaw slack, his heart shatter.  Though I loved the man and hated to see him in pain, he needed to see this, that I was right.  This needed to break his heart and make him open his eyes.  That was happening. 

In those few seconds, he was off guard.  I saw it all as he watched the screen.  At first, his eyebrows were lowered, squinting at the screen to hopefully get a better look at who my attacker was.  My eyes trained on him, I then saw something that made my heart spin and cringe.  His face went blank, of all emotions.  He was seeing her... as he could only stare for that little second.  The color slowly drained from his face and a recognizable expression returned: agony and disbelief. I watched his breath pick up and he looked ready to vomit; his eyes refused to leave the screen, as if begging for it to not be true.

I once told Luke that one day he would see I was right and he wouldn't forgive himself. I honestly wasn't sure if that day would ever come but if it did, I knew I would have taken satisfaction to him realizing how much pain he let be inflicted upon me.  I figured I would be happy to see him so upset, so lost for the fact that he didn't believe me before.  This was what he deserved for not believing me: agony and pain over what he let go on for so long.

Yet, as I watched his face and his heart fall, his whole life crumble, I felt his pain.  I couldn't be any more relieved, the fact that he came to that realization that it was her.  But I knew, with the kind of guy he was, he wouldn't get over this.  He wouldn't get over the fact that he married a woman so cruel, so evil.  He wouldn't get over that he didn't see it before, that he didn't listen to me.  Or that I even told him and he ignored me, that he was scared and therefore, closed his eyes to the truth.  He wouldn't get over this, and especially because he was a cop and he should have seen it, should have at least questioned it more.  He would hate himself, knowing that everything I said was true.  That she tortured me in such cruel ways, that she killed my little sister, that she would do the same if they had a child and he left her.

The disgust grew across his face.  Not over Clare or the things she did right now.  But disgust aimed at himself.  He started to shake his head, eyes closing tightly for that long moment.  He swallowed and when he did open his eyes, they met mine.  I never saw such a look aimed at me.  One so sorry, so full of pain, and so hurt.  He was looking at me for the first time as a sane individual, one that wasn't lying, one that went through all those terrible things in reality, his same reality.  He didn't want to believe it, that he was wrong.  That I was sane and Clare was crazy.  He didn't want to believe it, and I found out later, for more reasons than one.