Jack Who? (Book 1 Draft Version)

CHAPTER 26

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Practically jumping the arm of the couch, in one of those stage moves, that I knew from watching youtube videos of Jackal, he crossed the room to the kitchen bar, and was right back with the envelope in question. He held the notes visible to both of us as he silently read:

“I've missed five years of his life. And they were hard years for him--”

You are a good mother. “Pretty sure right here I said 'the best.'” Pointing at that particular part, he tipped a smile.

I know my life is not the life for him. I would stop touring. Am prob about to do that anyway, changes in my band. Many meetings.

Don't want 6 states between me and Tristan. Don't know what to do.

So much time wasted ..I want it all.

“The important part is the last part.” My nerves were so tight that a loud buzz had begun in my ears, like when I was pregnant, and had spells of high blood pressure. “I was trying to tell you that I've become greedy with this whole father thing.”

For a few silent seconds, his gaze rested on the paper, then it fell on my face. The eyes I looked into were as dark and sweet as chocolate, and when he spoke they glistened, “I was trying to say that I want my son, and his mother too.”

My mind went into motion, processing faster than the 3.5 GHZ laptop on the desk, which caught my panicked gaze. At last, I was brave enough to return to Jack's eyes.

“When I met you, when we—Mariss, I couldn't stop thinking about you. But my band was taking off like crazy. Then every time I would be so insane that I was going to come see you or do something about what I was feeling, something would happen that kept me busy, kept me too tired to think. And you would go to the back of my mind where it was easier to deal with.”

The paper fell to the table as he stood and paced a few steps. “Then after a few months, I was nuts with wanting to see you, I ended up asking you, to come out.” Loosely he referred to LA. “ I didn't even know I was going to ask you. It just came out."

My mind went back to that night, with remembrance of how surprised I had been, and insight that he was just as surprised by the invitation.

"I thought you felt the same way, and a part of me didn't care if you did. Thought I could talk you into seeing me, just because of who I was. Then I could trip you, make you fall for me." Hearing this sentence made me wonder if he even realized he spoke in verses of his songs sometimes.

"But you dissed me hard.” A wry grimace played on his lips. “I never got over you. That you wouldn't come.”

“You know now why I didn't though...”

Nodding, he tried to explain, and his words came in short sentences “I built this big thing in my head of us together. When I saw you. For the last couple of weeks now. I think I love you. I know I love you. And the other day, I was on my knees about to pop the question.”

“What?!” Already following his random pacing, and trying to follow his random words, I looked, intently finding the heat that fed the fervor in his words.

Crossing over, he returned, sinking to the sofa.

“I was. Remember I knelt beside you? And I don't know how it got so screwed up. What did happen in the screw up is I came to my senses. I know that was an impulse thing. I do want to marry you. But I know we need to work out a relationship between us before. We need to stop doing things backwards.”