Bad Enough for You (Currently Editing)

She Sprained Her Ankle Trying to Flash Me

Picture of Chantal to the right:) Thanks so much for all of the support, loves! I really appreciate it! 

12.] She Sprained Her Ankle Trying to Flash Me 

I always tend to make the mistake of pretending like certain parts of my life are a dream. Whenever something bad happened, like I was embarrassed in class by the teacher or one of my friends made me mad and I snapped, I liked to pretend that it was all just a bad dream. It was the best way to deal with the things in life that made me uncomfortable or made me embarrassed to be who I was. To pretend that I had dreamt it up was so much easier than accepting the fact that it actually did happen.

I don’t know what it was, but I could always feel my memories. Even if I wasn’t directly thinking about them, I could feel them, see them playing out in the back of my mind. It was a constant interruption to whatever it was I was trying to do and the more I didn’t think about it, the more that nauseas, ear-burning feeling crept upon me. It wouldn’t go away until I let myself fall into that hole and remember the thing I was so desperately trying to not think about.

The thing that I was trying my hardest to avoid thinking about tonight was that fight with Eli earlier in the morning. It was so stupid with what had happened, but just thinking about the way we had been tangled up caused my ears to burn. The girl who literally launched herself off of the bed and attacked him was not the same girl that was sitting on this patio with her adoring boyfriend and her closest friends. No matter how hard I tried to not think about my entanglement with Eli and listen to whatever it was that Ci was so excitedly rambling on about, I couldn’t stay focused.

My mind kept drifting back to the apartments, wondering what they were doing. Darkness had already fallen and thousands of stars adorned the night sky that hung over our heads. Even though we were overlooking the ocean and the city was behind us, I could almost hear the pounding bass overtop of the sound of the waves crashing into the shore. Looking out over the banister that was covered in white lights, I could almost see the people in the hallway, in the foyer where they moved against one another, their hips thrusting and hands winding up in sweaty shirts. I could hear the laughter, the drunken slurs of people trying to sing along to whatever Ke$ha song was playing on the sound system. Not only could I hear them, but I could see them, the glazed over look that filled the eyes of the girls as they tripped over nothing and laughed about it to their friends. I could see the lust in the guys’ eyes, see the way that they elbowed each other for a moment or two before one of them finally worked up the courage to go over to one of the girls leaning against the wall. I could see the drinks in their hands, the empty bottles littering the floors, the discarded Jell-O shot cups being kicked around by mindless feet.

I couldn’t deny the fact that I wanted to be there.

“Adrienne, are you okay over there?” A warm hand slipped over mine. Looking away from the ocean and realizing that I was nowhere near the apartments, but sitting on the patio of a restaurant in Jessamine, sipping some pink drink that I couldn’t recall the name of and had zero alcohol in it, the dazed smile fell from my face. I looked around the table, finding three pair of eyes staring at me with worry written deep in them.

Slapping on another smile, one that was just verging on fake, I looked to Blaine, who looked the most concerned. I quirked my lips slightly and nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. I shrugged my shoulders slightly, reached for my drink and said, “Of course. I was just thinking.”

Blaine didn’t say anything as the worry disappeared from his eyes and he ducked his head towards mine, kissing my cheek slightly. He paused, turning his head slightly so that he could whisper in my ear. “Are you sure? You’ve been zoning out all night.”