The Good Girl And Her Gangster Lover

Young Love

      It was another annoyingly bright ass Sunday morning. Like clock work I counted exactly ten seconds, before I could hear my mother knocking on my door.

     "Ramiya, it's time to get up sweetie. We can't be late for church.," she said through the door.

     "I'm already up Mom.," I called back. I lied in a bed a little longer waiting for the sound of her footsteps walking away.

     "Mom, you can go away now.," I called out frustrated.

     "Oh, I will dear. I'm just waiting until I hear you getting out of bed, & moving around.," she replied far to cheerfully.

     I gradually made it to the edge of the bed, praying for the day to come when I would actually get to sleep in. It wasn't until I was fully standing, & walking towards my closet that my mother called out "Thank you.," startling me before walking away.

     An hour later we were sitting in church making sure to get the good seats as my mother called them in order to better understand the Lords word better. What a load of bullshit, more like to make sure her & our perfect family were better admired by the church people. These seats just so happen to give off the perfect picture from all view points, and my mother fought tooth and nail to any other church mother who dared trespass on them. There was once even a rumor that Mama was sleeping with the Pastor, well that us until they got a real good look at my Daddy. That rumor pretty much died off fast, with some of the ladies trying to turn Dad's eye. I feel a sharp nudge in my side reminding me that morning prayer and worship is starting, and I'm supposed to rise to my feet.

     The Pastor beings his usual motivational sermon that of course only comes with years of wisdom. Today's different though this sermon is about letting go of all of ones secrets. That what's done in the dark will come to the light. "If you show shame, before Jesus. He to will show shame towards you, in front of his father," one of the pieces of his sermon I mange to catch, feeling the taste of those words on my tongue. I found that statement to be the most controversial contradiction I had ever heard. Did God show shame to people who did shameful things such as have love for women? Or did he punish those people who others regarded in shame, but yet felt no shame themselves for committing those acts?

     "Disgusting.," I heard my mother hiss. Following where she her had settled her hate filled gaze upon. I saw it was directed towards Devonte Morgan. Knowing what if felt like to be under my Mothers gaze when she was angry, I felt my respect for Davonte grown when he chose to boldly hold & meet my Mother's glare. Davonte's Mom noticed the stand off glare, & decided to stare my Mother down with one of her own, while putting her arm around Davonte in show of silent support.

     "Hmp.," my Mother said, looking away from them finally. When she acted this way it makes me realize her need to have the admiration of having a perfect family also shows how much ignorance she can give off to someone with the ability to see the bigger picture.

     After heading down to the altar for prayer, we took offering, & church was let out. Dad headed immediately to the other Deacons to catch up on the troubles of being a family man. While Mother managed to catch my arm just when I was about to sneak off to drag me to the other prominent church mothers, & their children. Walking towards them I saw the closing off their body language gave when Davonte, & his family walked by. He smiled at me, & I returned it making my Mother purposely step in front of me to block our line of sight. Once they had exited the church we continued our march to the other ladies, I personally asking God for strength not to slap one of them. 

     "Sister Vasquez, that was a wonderful sermon wasn't it? I tell you the spirit was really moving this morning." Sister Brooks exclaimed gleefully.