Then & Now

Chapter Fourteen

NOW

MAISY

I recognize him right away. As soon as I see those golden eyes, memories come flooding back, ones that I've fought myself from thinking about for so damn long now. Logan Stanfield is standing just a few feet away from me, and I suck in my breath as everything around me slows down and disappears. I feel as if I'm in some sort of horrible nightmare, and I can only imagine what my face looks like because, honestly, he's the last person in the world I expected to run into today.

He looks the same, yet different at the same time. He still has that strong, defined jaw he always did, and those beautiful, soulful eyes. But of course he's filled out over the years, and is now more of a man than the boy that I once knew. He's taller than when I saw him last and built like a quarterback, nicely filling out the dark, tailored three piece suit he's wearing. It looks expensive, as does his haircut, but his dark brown hair still falls over his eyes like it used to back then.

I glance down at my jeans and tank top, feeling sloppy and insignificant next to him. My father would roll over in his grave if he saw me right now. He always stressed that you should dress how you want yourself to be perceived. I guess my outfit is telling people that I want to be viewed as a college underclassman that stayed up all night at a kegger. After all this time, this isn't the impression I want to be making. I shift uncomfortably, tugging at the hem of my tank top, and pull my eyes away from him.

I don't know what to say, how to address the gigantic elephant in the room, or if I even should address it, but I can feel him watching me, waiting to follow my lead. So I take the coward's way out and pretend like I don't know who he is, that we didn't go to school together, and that we never spent one warm spring night wrapped up in each other's arms.

Shaking the others gentlemen's' hands, I keep my eyes from Logan and avoid taking his hand until I'm left with no other option. When I place it in his, that warm feeling spreads through me again, that same sensation that I felt like I was drowning in on that night so many years ago. He's looking at me with the most perplexed smile on his face, like he's trying to figure me out. Logan was always trying to figure me out.

I quickly withdraw my hand away and sink down into a chair across from all of them at the long, shiny conference table. The oldest gentleman in the room, Mr. Nash, smiles respectfully over at me, and offers his condolences. I nod and thank him, barely able to find my voice. I'm keenly aware of Logan sitting across from me, and I can feel his eyes still on me; it reminds me of how things were back then.

The first time I noticed Logan Stanfield he had Amanda Fisher's tongue down his throat. It was homecoming freshman year and I remember how I blushed when I saw the two of them on the dance floor next to Justin and me. I had stared back up at my date, nervous that something similar would be expected from me by the end of the evening, but Justin just rolled his eyes at the two of them and laughed. I relaxed, grateful that I had accepted Justin's invitation to the dance. He was a nice guy, someone my father approved of, and at that point in my life that mattered.

The next day it was all over school-- Amanda Fisher and Logan Stanfield were going out. Of course it didn't overshadow the other huge gossip of the day about Justin and me. Everyone was talking about the fact that we were now going steady, but the truth was he never asked. It just sort of happened. We went to the dance together, and then the next thing I knew we were going steady. I didn't fight it though. It seemed easier not to.

But I remember watching Logan and Amanda in the hallway between classes back then. They always were so wrapped up in each other, that it was like they didn't notice the crowd around them. I'd watch him press her up against the lockers with his body, cradling her head in his hands, and dominating her mouth with his. He looked so confident in what he was doing, not like the bumbling fools most guys our age were.