Diary of a Biatch

9. Secret Valentines

Now that Jay was no longer my boyfriend, boys had started asking me out again. Not that being with Jay stopped them, obviously.

Jay was alright for a while. He could be lovely and funny, but he was a bit of a dumb prick most times. And when he pulled the stunt with the plastic ring, that was it.

If a boy fucks up the first time, its certain that there will never be a second time, and that was my motto for boys, no matter how fit they were, that would be it.

Valentines Day was in two days, and I'd already started getting secret messages through the post and in my locker at school.

The first was a note that was pushed under the door of my locker. I opened it up, and in very indecipherable writing, it said:

Kaylie,

Hapy Valentines day!

Yor secret admirrerr xx

Okay... He spelt my name wrong (it's Kaila, not Kaylie) and he can't even spell the words 'happy' (hapy) 'your' (yor) and admirer (admirrerr). What a douche, mind!

I looked around and Sam, a fat, ginger boy, was 'hidden' by the corner, doofusly smiling in my direction. Okay, so he'd sent the note.

He was DEFINITELY NOT getting a date with me. NO WAY.

I stalked over to him and gave him a false smile. 'You?' I questioned, holding up the note. I knew it was from him, but, oh well, I'll let him know I'm not interested.

He smiled his goofy smile. He had horrible, yellow teeth. He stood up from his crouch and said, 'Well, yeah. Will you be my Valen-' he broke off from his arrogant tone.

Stupid fat Sam had been leaning against the wall, trying to act cool, but stupid fat Sam had tripped over his own feet and landed face-first on the marble floor.

'No, I will not be your Valentine,' I said, stifling my laughter. 'Oh, and, by the way, get some spelling lessons, will you?'

I quickly sauntered off and headed for a pissing-herself Mollie who had seen everything and burst out laughing myself.

Later that day, I seen Fat Sam walking to Science. He looked at me, turned beetroot-red and quickly took off in the wrong direction, while Mollie and I burst out laughing, yet again.

That was frigging hilarious.

After lunch, I went to my locker to get my books for my last lessons, and found another note tucked under the door. But this time it was a card. On the envelope, it said in fancy writing, 'Kaila'. Hmm, whoever it was knew how to spell my name this time. I opened the envelope and found inside a card with a red rose on. It was lovely, but too lovely for me. I wasn't really that romantic, to be honest.

Inside the card, it said:

'Dear beautiful Kaila,

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

You may not know it,

But I love you.

From a boy who likes you very much xxx'

I shuddered at how romantic it was. I looked around the crowded hallway and tried to find somebody, lurking in the corner facing my way, like Fat Sam. But everyone was in at their lockers. No one was staring at me creepily, or romantically, you could say.

I went to my next class, Business. I usually enjoyed Business, but my mind was preoccupied thinking about who the hell on earth would send me a Valentines card with that sickly-sweet overly-romantic stuff. Whoever it was obviously doesn't know my that well.