Drop Dead Gorgeous (YoungWritersPrize)

A Little Bit of Everything

 

You know that feeling that you get, when you hear your phone buzzing, and you know you got a text, and a certain person's name pops into your head, and your heart starts racing, you get all heated up…And then the cold shower when you see from who the text really is? I wasn't expecting him to message me. What was he thinking? 

Me: Don't you think that Lucas will-

Lucas will what? We are not together, he clearly stated that we never will…Lucas will do nothing. He doesn't care. Besides, I've never been on a date before and Jimmy did seem like a nice guy. I deleted the text and started a new one.

Me: Yeah sure, we can hang out I guess.

Hang out…it just sounded safer than a date. I was staring at the ceiling, thinking about him. The day we first met. In the cafeteria. I remember him saying: »You're a broken beauty…« The word that bothered me was – broken. How did he know? Or what did he mean by it? Broken. Broken. The word was echoing in my head. I wasn't really broken-

All of a sudden something hit the floor. I looked around the room and everything seemed to be in order. The school bag was on the table as always, the small green cactus was still in its colourful pot, the computer seemed intact…everything was were it was supposed to be. Even the teddy-bear with a broken eye was kindly smiling at me from the bookshelf. I got off the bed and looked under it.

Great. My phone fell on the floor. And there was something else…it was stuck behind my bed. I pulled the strange thing on the surface. A giant green sweater. Lucas's sweater. From that time he lent it to me.

Shit! I forgot to give it back. I was cuddling it in my arms, like I did Ash, touching that rough, weary fabric with my fingertips. I buried my head in that worn-out green pullover and breathed in the smell of washing powder and cigarettes. 

»Lucas…« I murmured into the green sweater.

I quickly snapped out of it. What is wrong with me? I do not like him! And even if I would…I would stop. Because he…doesn't like me. Not that way.

I threw his pullover on the desk and hid myself under the fluffy covers that hugged me every night. Even if I closed my eyes…there he was. His face, those dark, sad eyes. So beautiful.

Why are you the first thought when I wake up and the last when I go to sleep?

My dark angel.

                                               *                                   *                                 *

I got Jimmy's text the following day at school.

Jimmy: Tomorrow at Five?

I was looking at the phone screen for a while, picking my brain for a reply. Was I really going through with this?

Me: Sure. Where are we going?

I held my breath the entire time I was typing that text. I thought my lungs were going to explode. The phone buzzed. He was fast.

Jimmy: At the Park?

We're going to the park. And it's freezing outside. Oh well, maybe tomorrow will be better.

Me: Sounds good. See ya at Five!

Going out with Lucas's best friend. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing at all. Jimmy was cool. Nice. Happy.